I haven’t slept well for the past few nights.  And there is no reason why I shouldn’t be sleeping well.  I’m not under a huge amount of stress, overall life is good.

This morning the gf was so excited.  She gave me a huge hug, and tried to hype me up. “It’s your last day,” she says.  And I give her a sleepy smile and say I can’t get excited.  Because I can’t, not because I don’t want to be.

And she asks me if everything is ok and I spill the beans about not sleeping.  She smiles and says, “YOU ARE EXCITED!”

Apparently, excitement causes me to not sleep.  This is not funny or fun.

Today has been a really fun day, though.  My big boss took me out to lunch.  She bought me a present and everyone signed a card. Then we came back to the office and had birthday cake (it was the big boss’s birthday) All of it was lovely.  And I’m so sad.

At some point this summer, I came to really like the people that I work with, and at some point, I came to really LOVE this little city.

This afternoon L and I took a walk around downtown. After the huge lunch and the bosses birthday cake, we needed to get the blood pumping.  And it hit me.  I really love this girl.  She’s one of those people that come into your life like she’s always been there.  I’ve known her for less than three months, but damn, she knows more of my business  than people that have known me for years (and she gets me and all my lame-ass intellectual jokes!!!). And after this summer, it’s gonna be hard to maintain the friendship that we have built. And that makes me sad.

I’ve established relationships with so many of my co-workers.  My co-workers are the coolest.  These are people that I can call on when I have a problem or a question or I just need someone to bounce my ideas off of.  And after this summer, I won’t be able to just walk down and plop myself in their offices.

And downtown D-town is the best (especially today with temperatures in the 80’s and not the 100’s!) It’s like Mayberry crossed with Manhattan (I know it sounds weird but it is the best, seriously)

And my internship has had its moments.  I have experienced here. (I’m big on experiencing things) And I’ve had fun here. And I’m sad, because there have been a lot of days when I thought that I wanted to get the hell out.  And I do. But I don’t.

See, that’s the thing about change and me.  We have a bittersweet relationship.

I don’t like change but I do like to do different stuff. So today I try to figure out how to keep things the same and different at the same time.  Because I don’t really want to stay here but I don’t want to leave all my people behind.  (I’m still trying to convince L to quit and come home with me.)

I already ache for the people that I’m leaving here. And I already miss the places that I love here.

But change happens and I gotta  go.